Life of Carmen, Uncategorized


Rooster-crowingScreaming down Seaford Road on my bike in the bucketing rain, i rocket round the tight horseshoe curve to Lagoon Road, crowing, WhatEVER!!!! WhatEVER!!! at the top of my lungs. With no one to hear me, not a single car, just grey fog, and rain. Rain, rain, and more rain. Aw hell, let it rain, bring it on! WhatEVER!!!

After weeks of wiffling and waffling and riding my edge, chewing on my arm, late last night I reached the point of whatEVER! An explosive release, into the big question mark. So I stay. So I go. So I have a lover, so I sleep alone. So I rise, so I fall, so I succeed, so I fail. I take this job. I take that job. I take no jobs. I give up. WhatEVER!!!

Not the whatever of the shoulder shrug, not the whatever of the sullen child, but the WHATEVER of surrender, head back, arms thrown wide. The roosters scream it, long before dawn. The sun is coming, the sun is coming! Will there be corn, will there be hens, will there be the soup pot, will there be rain? Who knows, who fucking cares?! The sun is coming, the sun is coming! WAKE UP! WhatEVER!!!

One Commnet on “WhatEVER!!!

  1. The best (and only) attitude we can have is “whatever.” Just this morning I realized that my constant thoughts and comments about EVERYTHING keep in me samsara. There is no such thing as a good day or a bad day. They are concepts. Even a “day” is a concept for Pete’s sake! I’m learning not to believe my thoughts, LOL. Hey! Found this quite liberating.

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