Category: Upaya Zen Center

Aging & Dying, Life of Carmen, Uncategorized, Upaya Zen Center, Zen & Dharma

The lady in the chemo hat

I am the jikido (timekeeper) for evening zazen meditation. This duty involves sparking up the candles and incense in the zendo, guiding lost visitors to a cushion, and keeping the time. I strike the heavy temple bell to begin the sessions and signal the breaks. At the hour’s end I chime the chubby brass handbell …

Aging & Dying, Life of Carmen, Uncategorized, Upaya Zen Center, Zen & Dharma

Attachment is the enemy of intimacy

 Scrawled in a toilet stall with a black sharpie: “separation -> anxiety”.  That’s it—dukkha in a nutshell. Crave it, grab it, hold it tight and make it yours. Never let it go. But here’s the news: everybody leaves. Everybody dies. Everybody forgets, and everyone is forgotten. Time is fleeting and opportunity is lost. Opportunity isn’t …

Life of Carmen, Uncategorized, Upaya Zen Center, Zen & Dharma

Don’t follow me i’m lost too

The whole point of this exercise is that there is no point…I mutter this mantra to myself. And then I try not to try, to let that mutter gently dissolve into the empty chaos of my mind. I was having a pretty good zazen, all told. And then all hell broke loose. Maria Rinzan, Upaya’s …