Archive for the ‘Non Moms’ Category

I have no pictures of my mother

Saturday, March 31st, 2012

I remember my mother as a small, solidly built woman with angry blue eyes. She is sitting at the kitchen table, drinking cold coffee and smoking MatinĂ©e Lights. I can’t remember ever having had a real conversation with her, about anything. We hardly knew each other except as adversaries. (more…)

Aging recklessly

Thursday, September 30th, 2010

I am in the hot tub at Hollyhock. The gently swirling water lifts my breasts pleasantly and suddenly i remember – ah ha! – they used to do that all by themselves. Time passes.

I often feel caught in some odd eddy of time’s current. Due mostly (I believe) to 47 years of self-propelled living – of dancing and biking and following my meandering path – I am healthy and strong. All my parts still work, and I don’t really know what it means to feel “old” – I feel more of a child, more curious and sensuous and wide-eyed in wonder, every day. And then also, maybe because I am a micronaut or have those genes or have just never learned how to act like a grown-up, I am usually taken to be ten or 20 years younger than my numbers. I guess that is a gift, and I am grateful to have it – although I often encounter the disrespect or dismissal that people direct at the young, and it is as tedious and annoying as it is flattering. (more…)

Your parents will die. They will leave you some money.

Thursday, April 29th, 2010

If your parents are still alive, note this: they will die. And when they die, they will probably leave you some money. There is nothing to gain by denying this. If this is true for you, acknowledge it and be free. You will never want, and your best course of action is generosity and adventure.

I speak from a position of average middle-class North American privilege, and of course I certainly don’t speak for everyone – each of our situations is unique. But most of the people I know fall roughly into my extended socio-economic bubble, and most have or had parents, who have or had property, savings, or investments. And unless their family relationships were especially convoluted or estranged, it is a given that when they pass on, their assets will be distributed amongst their blood relatives. (more…)

Procreation meditation

Monday, August 28th, 2006

My period was almost three weeks late. It got me thinking.

I thought I was reconciled to my offspringless state, at peace with that decision. But as days ticked by, crampless and dry, a fetal image formed in my head. I really didn’t want to be pregnant…but if I was… well hey! in less than nine months, I could have:

-A a clear focus and priority for my life.
-A a source of endless fascination.
-A reason to play, every day.
-Something which would inspire admiration (and envy oh yah! my brother will turn moss green) in people, but also to make them smile and remind them of what is best in themselves.
-A precious gift to my father — his first and only grandchild.
-The trippy thrill of seeing the reflection of own eyes, my hair, my walk, my speech patterns and irritating habits and purple prose and pearls of wisdom — in intricate and unpredictable combination with those of a beautiful man whose love planted this seed.
-A contribution to the future, a wanted child who could help to save it, a chance for my presence to linger in this world after I am dead and buried

-Unconditional love.
-Immortality. (more…)


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